Reflections (not like Mulan...well, ok, a bit like Mulan)

So here I am again, completely procrastinating because I know I'll be outta here a week from tomorrow. "Whew, this has gone by so fast," I would love to say; but I won't, because this would be a lie. Why is it that second semester seems to have dragged on and on for simply ages? 

So now that I have finally and practically conclusively come to an end to my first year experience at Cornerstone, what do I have to say for myself? Drum roll please.....nothing. Ok, no, I am not trying to sound like a total Katie downer (love me, Katie!), nor am I shooting for the masochistic, I can't do anything right status. But I have to say, I honestly do not feel like I've grown at all. Now, let's get something straight. I know this to be a nefarious falsehood, because I think more or less every year I feel like this. I always think to myself "well, this year was pointless," and it's usually not until much later that I see just how purposeful it was. This year does seem to have been particularly anticlimactic, though. I have been working on so many areas of my life that none of them seems to have made any progess. I have learned no major lessons, I have made no major changes, and I have no major changes to look forward to just yet. I suppose that is really the reason for my current sentiments. This is the first year in three years that I don't have a major transition upon me (2006, new high school; 2007, college; 2008, new college). It's nice not to be preparing for a new place, but I'm not quite used to it. I feel oddly unaccomplished.

Maybe I'm just saying all this to hear it contradicted (ok, sidenote: that reminded me of Pride and Prejudice when Lady Catherine storms into Elizabeth's house with the famous "Heaven and earth! Are the shades of Pemberly to be thus polluted?"). Maybe I'm looking for a "no, no, Elisa, you've actually grown into exactly the woman God wants you to be," which better not be any of your responses because it isn't true and if it was, God would have some explaining to do. Or perhaps it is just time I reflected. Regardless, I'm sure weeks or months or years down the road, I'll begin to see how God was working this year. It's just a matter of eternal perspective, of which I have a very little amount. 

Well, nothing like a novel by Elisa to keep you all busy, eh ladies? Sorry to be so contemplative. Should I appologize for that? Ah, whatever. This is "what you love about me," right? Don't answer that. 

Eternal love and thankfulness to you all,

e l i s a