Friday, November 19, 2010

Read this blog to find out about my plans.

Since I went public with my big life changing news this week, I suppose I can blog about it now. I am apparently prophetic. Toby read a facebook status and misconstrued the meaning of it, thinking that I was pulling out of SIM (Toby, you weren't the only one who misunderstood that status) and days later I find out that in fact, I did need to pull out of SIM. But the story about SIM isn't why I'm blogging. It's the big event in my life, but really not the big thing in my life.

Do you ever feel like you are focusing on one thing so much in your relationship with God that you miss everything else? Spiritual Tunnel Vision? I think that's what I'm recovering from. To some extent, I think everyone has it. I think it must be part of the fall. We're so focused on ourselves that we can't extend our focus to too many other things at once. Well, the past few months have been about me trusting God's plan for my life. That's about it. Not to diminish the importance of that, but that's all I was talking to God about. God help me to trust your plan. God help me to see your plan. Give me clarity. Preferably NOW.

You know, yesterday, I did a search for the word "plan" in the bible using my trusty online ESV study bible. Then I started clicking on New Testament results. First on Matthew. 4 results. The catch? The search engine had not actually returned any results for the word "plan" but had instead returned 4 instances of the word "plant" or some form of it. In the ESV (the same is not true of the NIV) the word "plan" actually does not occur in the synoptic gospels. And, as far as I can tell from my quick internet searches, Jesus actually never uses the word "plan." What does that say? Jesus does not talk about plans. He talks about plants. There are a lot of plans in the bible, and most of the time, they're no good. Instead, what are we to do? Be rooted in Christ!

The day before I found out for sure that SIM was a no-go, a friend gave me a devotional that took me to 1 Thessalonians 4:3- For this is the will of God; your sanctification. The will of God has very little to do with where I actually am and very much to do with who I am becoming. So, what is my focus now? Well, I'm trying to roll with the punches. I've sent out a lot of resumes. I've started dreaming about apartments. I've started praying about what God wants to teach me right now. I can tell you one thing. I'm not making any plans.

Saturday, November 13, 2010

What on earth am I doing here alone again...

I know I'm not supposed to post here. And after this, I'll never post again. But I've been watching a bit too much Alias, so I decided to hack in to ask for a favor.

Because honestly, it makes me feel a bit silly to check this blog twice a week when there are never any posts for nearly a month! I hear a small voice in my head saying, "Are you serious? What are you, some kind of stalker? You're more interested in this blog than they are! That's pretty messed up, pal." I don't know about you, but I hate it when my inner voice refers to me as "pal."

So how about it? I know you all haven't been in bed for the entirety of the past month. And even if you were in bed for a month, that type of illness would probably be blogworthy. What is new in the life of Beady's near and far?

Toby

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