No explanations here...

Do any of you have things in your life that don't really seem like that big of a deal, so you ignore them, let them fester, maybe even try to fix them, but never really commit to anything? So, it stays the same. And there's this lingering voice in the back of your head that says that maybe, just maybe, you should deal with that. BUT, there are other things, you know, that seem to take priority. So you wobble on the edge, hoping that Satan will never use that thing to your disadvantage. Well, I'm learning how unwise a position that is to be in.
There's something so very vulnerable about the last 8 weeks of college. I'm there, and I'm stressed, and uncertain. It was easy to trust the Lord when it seemed like there was a general plan, but now, a lot of things have been called into question. And partially because of that lingering problem I mentioned above. Sorry to be cryptic. I think what I'm going through isn't really something I want to share with the blogosphere. And it isn't even something I've shared with all of the beadies. But it is real. And hard. And confusing. And frustrating. And in no way liberating. And yet, I know that in Christ I am free. How do I reconcile that with what is happening? How do I believe that Christ has freed me when I feel so chained down and helpless? And by something so small!
Satan is smart. He could have really used this a year ago. Or five. But he knew It'd get me now. When I'm vulnerable. And, when I've been doing well with the whole trusting the Lord thing. I really was doing well. And then this. For lack of a better phrase: It sucks.
A friend told me this week, "You're right. Explanations will probably be the hardest part. But you don't owe anything to anyone but the Lord."
When will I learn?